The conundrum of being right and otherwise.
Being Right.
Being seen right
Perceived right
Having a reputation for being the right person
Being dependable
Being normal
Being that example.
We all live life initially on guidance or by perceived ways from the environment. Most of the things we imbibe without spoken instructions. An impressionable wrong person can perceive things and accordingly take a course of action based on what is perceived by the environment.
And unknowingly some of us find pride in always “Being Right”. Being that person who is always responsible and thus there is no space for some minor adjustments and especially failures.
This thinking of always being right as per me makes you gullible, easily impressionable, sometimes not having a personal opinion, and also most of the time filled with guilt.
For example, being right for some could be as simple as not indulging in a sweet after meal. But this rule need not be written in a rock and followed. But what makes this good practice a terrible thing is the guilt we associate with if sometimes it is not followed. This can go to another level, by fasting once you decide to feast. Which makes you get into self punishment cycle, unknowingly. I would eat it now, and I would fast harshly for next 2 days. This leaves the body with mainly guilt for having indulged a bit, this also leaves the body in shock of the ensuing fast later on and the brief indulgence which it had wasn't impressionable enough for it to register “It's great, I am enjoying”. While indulging itself there are underlying traces of guilt.
So here being right, as per the refined understanding is, eat in peace and enjoy it to the maximum without any other emotion involved. Be assured that I have a good routine in place to take care of this indulgence or I am ok to have that extra fat in the body, which would be honored as mine.
“The Right person”, often is not doing something just for himself and his satisfaction. He does what he does to be perceived as a dependable individual. He would like to exude that energy that the others know what he would do and there is more predictability about him. Basically someone “ Normal” or “ Not weird” and “Easy to be with”. So being around him is comfortable and most of things happening around is predictable. In growing up years, a kid who is a bit rebellious, is always someone who does not want to follow something normal. We label her as a rebel or even more harsher labels, but actually, she unknowingly exercising her right to be in her own space and do her own stuff. But brows are raised around her and hush-hush murmur about her “behavior” is always part of corridor talks.
Most of us does not want to come under the moral scanner of the society around. So we tend to do the right stuff and pass off under the radar.
What we are missing by this, is an exploration of your true needs and the expression of oneself in a unique way.
In the modern day psychology, there is a lot of emphasis on being “the authentic self”. Unless you grow up imbibing that from your younger years, honoring yourself and being you is a struggle and a lot of hard work to be put in. How many around are ready for the real you?
