Deep and shallow

The advent of social media gives you easy access to connections. The easiness and plenties of it, make them fleeting. As well as shallow or result oriented. In any age a deep relationship, where you can express yourself without inherent judgment, even if judged, can be said and debated kind of equation no more exists.

In recent times, a lot of such connections I was involved in. For instance, there was one which straight up vibing to the level of ordering stuff for each other and making plans to meet up. But I tend to notice that it is just the initial rush that is enticing and later it fizzles out.

When I look back, because of the ideological differences, that being said I was conditioned to believe that family and only family can be close enough. With this thinking, when you approach any relationship outside the home, you have already put a guard on and of course, the other end would sense it. That said never had any close friendships growing up. None whom I can confide in and none whom I can say as that 3 AM friend, who would definitely be grouse but comply to my then pressing need. I am comfortable putting that person thru that experience as well without regrets. This brings me to early adulthood, I couldn't forge tight female friendships at all with all this conditioning. Male friendships as they famously say in Bollywood “ Pyar dosti hai”. Most of them were going that way and most of us do not know how to deal with rejection. So they turn sour. But one such friendship did turn out to be a lifetime partnership and hugely grateful for that too.

Coming to the present, when you are in your 40s and you realize that you don't have “Deep” connections, those which can give sage advice or make you see a different perspective or just drink it up and regret it later. Your spouse can never be that, you would always have a male/spouse perspective on it. His need to protect you always would hover over, your need to be heard and reflected. Although with constant work it can be made to work. So you might wander in cyberspace for friendships. An introvert needs that veil to approach. You might say, why not go to a social event and mix up? Not workable because of awkwardness which sets in social situations.
The veil which I might use as my security to open up slowly, can be other parties’ wrap-up to all the red flags which the wisest cant detect even after multiple interactions.

So the question remains in this time where we mostly stoop into a screen in the waking hours, is deep connections a possibility? Or an AI tool would be there for that too!